How to Tell if Someone is NOT the Expert They Think They Are

With the bevy of online gurus, experts, coaches and inspirational bloggers who offer advice on how to achieve our dreams, be successful and quit our day jobs, I think it’s time we set a standard on whether or not these experts deserve our attention.

Here are my guidelines.

You are not a guru/expert/coach if…

1. You don’t listen to your own advice. 

No matter how wonderful your blog is, if you haven’t published a book you are not an expert on publishing. I’m amazed at the number of self-publishing geniuses these days.

On the other hand this guy is a publishing expert and a durn good editor. (Todd, is “durn’ ok to use? Also, should I capitalize ‘ok’ or spell it okay?)

2. You walk doesn’t match your talkity-talk-talk.

Shakespeare said it best: “Words! Words! Words!” The old adage in writing is show, don’t tell. The same applies for my benchmark for the guru/expert/coach: if they show me by their actions, I will listen–otherwise, it’s just words.

Bryan Allain is one

3. You live in a van…down by the river. chrisfarley-mattfoley-snl-debut-1993-585x418

This one is debatable because who doesn’t like a van by a river? But even Chris Farley would agree that just because you have a blog on “business success tips” doesn’t mean you’re a success. Anyone can be an entrepreneur from behind a WordPress blog, but it takes real guts to actually start a business and make it turn a profit.

This guy is an inspiration when it comes to really walking the walk–and he’s doing research on minivans, so there’s that too.

Now the real question…am I an expert on who is an expert?

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No Net

Did you see that guy who walked across the Grand Canyon on a tightrope?

As I was watching the video I thought…

He’s crazy.

He’s passionate.

He’s an inspiration.

Isn’t that who we are as creatives?

We go out on the limb that’s far too slender to hold our weight because that’s where the fruit is at. (Tweet that)

We know that if we keep doing things the same way, we’ll experience no change, no results and no growth. Continue reading “No Net”

What Artists Do

What artists do
What artists do

I like rebranding.

I like the word ‘rebranding’ because it carries a connotation of bringing new and fresh ideas to something (or someone) that needs an inside-out makeover.

And artists need rebranding.

Why? When we hear the word artist, we can’t hear it without baggage of some sort. Some of the baggage is positive–we think of words like ‘creative,’ ‘inventive’ and ‘imaginative.’ And we also may feel some negative baggage when words like ‘unemployed,’ ‘temperamental’ and ‘irresponsible’ come to mind when someone calls themselves an artist.

Artists are not painters, actors, designers, writers… they are, but they’re more than that.

What really makes and artist an artist?

Artists bring change. 

Artists challenge us.

Artists make our senses come alive. They give sight to dim eyes and open ears full of distraction and worry.

In an often numbing world, artists make us feel again.

***

To the…

  • Administrator answering the phones today
  • CEO making big decisions
  • Painter picking up the brush again
  • Roofer laying shingles
  • Actor reading for the casting director

…you are an artist of change. Your work is good.  (Tweet that)

How to Cure People Pleasing

Harlequin
Michelle Brea via Compfight

Sometimes I’m a people-pleaser. I think many artists are bent in that general direction.

As artists, we often want applause, recognition or just the satisfaction of knowing we’ve made a difference. None of those things are innately wrong…until they become an obsession.

I know I can be overzealous at times.

I want to be wanted.

I like to be liked.

And I pretend it doesn’t matter to me if someone doesn’t like me–but it does matter.

Why? Because making people happy makes me happy–that’s why I love humor–that’s why I love entertaining, writing and any type of creating that changes something in someone.

Laugh it Up

So how do we fix a people-pleasing mentality?

I don’t know, but the only thing I can suggest is a bit of humor for tempering.

In that light, I present to you three miserable attempts at people pleasing, compliments of my dayjob…

1. Refuse to call people by their actual, real-life names.

There’s someone at work who’s name I got wrong when I first met her. She gave me a look as if to say “and you’re our PR Manager?”Look well deserved.

I called her the wrong name again this past week–and I’ve known her for about six months now. Impressive? Prolly not? Continue reading “How to Cure People Pleasing”

Do What You Have to Do to Do What You Want To Do

The pathway to living our artistic dreams has a lot more “have to’s” before all the “want to’s” come to fruition. 

We’ve all heard the story of the journey of a butterfly from caterpillar, to cocoon and then to emerging as a beautiful butterfly. But if that butterfly gets any assistance breaking free from the cocoon, it won’t develop the strength needed to fly.

Big magic - Grosser Zauber
Margrit via Compfight

It’s difficult to break free.
It’s not always pleasurable to toil.
It may even feel like wasted time–but we’re developing the strength to fly.

As a creative person, do you ever feel the same way? Continue reading “Do What You Have to Do to Do What You Want To Do”

Belief Comes First

I know a handful of millionaires.

Though they’ve earned their greenbacks in different ways, they have one thing in common: confidence.

I don’t mean the brazen, teenage-like confidence that disgusts. They posses a humble confidence which exudes from the core of their beliefs.

Millionaires believe that…

  • They make good decisions.
  • They will continue to make good decisions.
  • They must continue to grow and learn.

They’re artists of decision-making. Continue reading “Belief Comes First”

Do. Something. Differently.

As creatives, we’ve got to ask ourselves a few pertinent questions from time to time.

  • What really fulfills me?
  • What do I have to give?
  • How do I sustain my creative projects?

They’re not easy questions for creative people to answer. We tend to be nonspecific in our desires, knowing we want something but not defining it succinctly.

We may have vague, foggy notions about what we want but as the sun starts to peer through the fog a pseudo-religious attitude craftily whispers “stop being so selfish! Why do YOU think you should get what you want? Be happy with what you’ve got.”

That’s #$%@!

What the world needs is people who are fully alive and who generously share themselves with others…artists. (Tweet that)

But sometimes it may seem easier to be unhappy and feel unfilled than to clearly define what we want.

Freedom / Coney Island Mermaids Parade 2007 / SML
See-ming Lee via Compfight

Do. Something. Differently.

When we try to answer those three pivotal questions listed above, we may get confused, frustrated or despondent for one simple reason: we don’t know what we want.

Or worse, we ramble on and on (and on) about a multitude of interests and desires, refusing to hone in on one place to start.

My 2 cents: start. Do. And do something differently.

I’ll start with what my answers would be…

  • What really fulfills me? Creating stories (via film, written word and/or acting) really fulfills me.
  • What do I have to give? I can give my talents and education that I’ve honed over the past 25 years to accomplish what fulfills me.
  • How do I sustain my creative projects? I can make that happen by writing 10 minutes everyday, auditioning and not overworking at my day job.

As we come fully alive in our creativity, we invite others to do the same.

***

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Several Reasons Why You May Not Want to Cut the Cable Cord

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Today’s post is from a great college friend of mine, Jeremy Doan. After Jeremy read 14 Reasons This Artist Doesn’t Need Cable TV, he and I had a stimulating Twitter conversation resulting in me asking if he’d share his thoughts with you.

And I’m so very glad he did. Enjoy…

Jeremy’s bio: “I am the husband of Superwoman and a father of four part-time devil children (with another on the way). By day I work as a software engineer.  The rest of the time, I am an amatuer photography, a film-watcher, a book-reader, a music-listener, and a nature-experiencing. In other words, I am a short-talented Renaissance Man.”

Feel free to connect with Jeremy on Twitter.

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I  don’t completely agree Andrew’s post “14 Reason This Artist Does Not Need Cable TV”. After reading it, I considered writing a snarky reply entitled, “14 Reasons Why Every Artist Needs Cable TV.” That would have been fun.

However, further contemplation revealed that I did not want to provide counterpoint to each of Andrew’s points, but to add some nuance to the overall spirit of the post. I agree (mostly) with this spirit. I even agree with several of his points. I particularly appreciate points 9 and 10—you do not need Cable to get the really good shows.

Thus, I took a break from my YouTube viewing to write a psuedo-reply.

Walden Pond and Greenwich Village

A key factor, possibly even the most important factor, for creativity is discipline. As Andrew has pointed out on many occasions, inspiration does not come by accident.

We have to seek it out.

Creativity involves work.

Creativity takes discipline and intentionality.

Creativity involves action–we either peer through the distractions, or prune them from the path. Thoreau found inspiration on Walden Pond. Dylan found inspiration in Greenwich Village. To a great extent, inspiration and creativity occur despite our surroundings. As William Blake says:

“I question not my Corporeal or Vegetative Eye any more than I would Question a Window concerning a Sight: I look thro [sic] it & not with it.” (From A Vision of the Last Judgment) Continue reading “Several Reasons Why You May Not Want to Cut the Cable Cord”